34 ½ weeks - this week I have been mostly...

…trying to keep calm!
Yes, I am getting very close now, and have had a bit of a wobbly weekend. Realised that I have generally been pretty ungrateful when people tell me I’m looking well because I don’t really feel like it means anything, what do they expect me to look like? But that’s a bit mean really, it’s nice to have people compliment you, especially when you feel dreadful.
I am nervous about the following, in no particular order…

• I will have a medical team that I have never met (and it will be a team, as there’ll be 2 of everyone!)
• that the babies will arrive before I feel ready (but quite how I ever think I’ll be ready, I don’t know) My friend who was due with twins 2 days before me (ie 5 May) gave birth at about 32 weeks
• that the babies won’t arrive on time, which means induction, which I don’t want. I have to keep an open mind though, to both induction and c section as I am “high risk”
• giving birth lying on my back. All the books I have been reading about pain management techniques talk about how lucky we are that the dark ages of giving birth on your back are over. Clearly, they have never been to Hong Kong. Induction = “strapped to the bed” according to the midwife.

…feeling the strain…
The boys are just over 2kg each now, so what with two placentas, a giant uterus and 50% more blood I am getting heavy, and it’s blinking painful. I am not amused when people say “Wow, you’re getting huge!” a) I know and b) I’m not sure that is an acceptable thing to say to anyone ever! While I am obviously not dieting or anything, “huge” kind of equals “unhealthy” in my brain, which I don’t like. I have also been having a lot of trouble sleeping, mostly because I have lost muscle tone and fat from my thighs, so my hip joints don’t have so much padding as I sleep on my side. I have a folded up blanket under the sheet, which helps a bit. I am slightly concerned though that this is spreading across my pelvis and down my thighs. One to ask the doc about today!

…having my last scan, thank God!
Last week was the last one, yay! It lasted about 1hr 20 mins, and was probably the most painful yet. Now that I have met a few other twin mums, I know that I am not alone in finding this really painful. Again, I feel ungrateful because we have been lucky to have so many really. For a singleton, people generally get a scan at 12 weeks, and one at 20 (same as the UK I think) We got a fantastic look at Lee’s face, because he was just in the right position (which is precisely the wrong position for measuring the circumference of his head!) They are both head down now, and Bruce is “very engaged”. While this doesn’t necessarily mean anything’s happening soon, it does mean they are good to go! Surely no space to turn around now boys?!

…touring the obs unit…
This was good, the midwife was nice and friendly, and it was great to see where it’ll all happen and what the process is. I will not move into the delivery suite til I’m 3cm dilated, so I will be without Ross until that point, as he’s not allowed on the ward, only in the delivery suite. Having said that, you have to be in the delivery suite for an epidural to be administered, which is likely to happen relatively early for me (again, because of the twin thing). I was well impressed to hear that they have a tens machine and a birthing ball! Very 21st century. No shower / bath / birthing pool though.

…wandering about work…
I’m at work another 2 weeks, and I really don't know if I will make it. I will be so angry if I go home one evening and give birth! The way that I feel at the moment, I need a couple of days at least to rest before the fun begins. My last day is April 12th so I’ll be working till 36 + 3. The doc has said that I will most likely be induced at 38 weeks, and average natural gestation for twins is 37. You can see my concern! For mat leave they have offered me 10 weeks (the standard) +all my annual leave (15 days) + 4 weeks unpaid. Not quite the 4 months that I asked for….

…getting a helper…again
We are in the process of hiring Lynette, which is a relief. Unfortunately because the whole malarkey has taken so long, she probably won’t start till mid-May or so, but I’m sure we can cope until then. My mum will be here for a while during that time, so I am trying to convince myself that it’ll be ok. I am strangely worried about eating, as if cooking and washing up are two tasks that we just can’t manage…weird.